second post of the day. cause of some random thought thats passing through my head

okays,

i keep thinking bout the testimony that was shared yesterday

especially bobby's testimony. i teared abit, hehs :\

the 3 testimonies; they were lost but now they were found.

and i was thinking when would it be my turn?

okay, in a way God found me back.

after almost 3 years of running away from church and cell, doing quite abit of stupid things

im finally back to church, a fire for God bigger than before.

but what about forgiveness?

no matter how i try to see it in a positive manner,

no wait, there's NO WAY this could even be seen from a positive point of view.

i cant bring myself to forgive them and love them like how i did many years back

its something pretty much impossible to do

everytime i see or hear certain things im full of envy and i feel like asking God "why me?!"

although i know that this turning for the better is close to impossible so i really pray that one day i would be able to accept totally, forgive and love again.

on a side note: i doubt most wont understand this post (;